Life has a way of unfolding that can surprise us, often in the most unexpected ways. My journey began under the shadow of early trauma—experiencing physical, mental, and sexual abuse. These experiences shaped my view of the world, instilling a profound sense of distrust and an overwhelming belief that safety was an illusion. Frustration, anger, and fear became my constant companions, and rather than confront these emotions, I unconsciously chose a path of avoidance. I buried myself in work, over exercising, and even overeating, all in a quest for external validation to feel worthy.

 

Then, at the age of 24, life took a dramatic turn when I was involved in a car accident that left me grappling with severe physical pain. I had just embarked on my journey as a remedial massage therapist, unaware of how transformative that path would become for my healing. The accident forced me to pause, to stop running from my feelings, and to confront the shadows that had haunted me since childhood.

 

As my body slowed down, my mind kicked into high gear. Memories I had long buried resurfaced, flooding me with feelings of helplessness, vulnerability, and confusion. With deep-seated trust issues, I hesitated to reach out to anyone—friends, family, even professionals—fearing judgment and rejection.

 

Yet, I had spent years working in mental health, and I was familiar with the tools that could help me navigate this turbulent phase. But sometimes, knowledge alone isn't enough. Thankfully, not long after my accident, I discovered the wisdom of Buddhism. This newfound understanding of the mind illuminated my path, helping me grasp why we think, feel, and react to life’s challenges the way we do. Soon after, I found a deep connection with yoga, which further awakened my body awareness and allowed me to embrace the emotions that had long been suppressed. Through this practice, I began to merge feeling with consciousness, slowly learning to listen to my body and untangle the layers of trauma, conditioning, and societal expectations.

 

This journey has been heavy, but it has been profoundly necessary for my personal growth. I’ve seen people come in and out of my life, changed jobs, left my marriage, and stepped away from family norms. I’ve had to advocate for my worth repeatedly while watching my father navigate his own struggles, ultimately leading to his early departure from this world.

 

Today, I am grateful for all these experiences. They no longer hold emotional sway over me; instead, they’ve shaped me into the person I am today. I carry a deep understanding of the importance of holding space for myself, even in my lowest moments. Now I can talk about my journey openly, empowered by my past rather than defined by it.

 

I’ve created a life for myself that once felt unattainable. Navigating through the storm of intense emotions isn’t always easy, but the positive ripple effect it has on the quality of my life is undeniable. Every step forward is a testament to the strength and resilience I’ve cultivated along the way, reflecting the woman I have become.